A simple sunset

Have you ever sat and watched a sunset? I mean just simply sat and watched the sunset before your eyes? From actually being in the sky the sun just disappears! How amazing is the world. So we’ve been in Montenegro, Croatia into Bosnia then back to Croatia and now we sit. Just sit, on the beach front, drinking a cold beer and appreciating all that’s good in life and it’s amazing. God is amazing, he’s amazing in Thurrock don’t get me wrong but when you allow yourself to roll round Gods world it will, and I don’t use this lightly, it will blow your mind. As I sat in complete awe of the works of God’s hands all I could do is ponder on him. I felt the distinct voice of the boss simply say ‘’don’t forget this’’, where ever you end up in the world, whatever you doing don’t forget this time, right now, don’t forget where I’ve brought you from and where your feet are standing right now! Heaven tells the glory of the almighty God and the sky’s announce what his hands have made, day after day there telling his story, night after night they tell it again. Never in my life have these words from such a long time ago been so real, so true so evident to my eyes,, and God message in all this is simple, Don’t forget, don’t turn your back, don’t get home and fall into routine and forget what I have shown you. Where you once were and where you are now!
As an aside, do you ever watch the sunset and wonder, maybe it’s a wonder or maybe just a vague hope or idea that someone is watching it with you? That the same sun that leaves your sight is ready to brighten up that someone else’s world with the same intensity and maybe as you sit in a far corner of the earth just watching and thinking, is their someone, somewhere in the world watching and thinking of you? Hoping and thinking the same?

Or maybe that’s just me

did you indeed, squeeze it like a lemon?

Have you ever stood in the shadow of greatness?
Have you stood in the beauty of creation and had your breath literally taken away?
And then, have you ever walk the streets of desperation, looked into the face of the poor and been able to say ‘’blessed are you’’ Mire si vini Gjakova. I’ve had the privilege, honour and pleasure of spending 3 months of my life watching, as in the face of crippling poverty, in the hearts of the hopeless and in the eyes of the broken. God, is building his kingdom. In the centre of the city, in the park by the hotel stands a tree. In the midst on the concrete, and the people and the noise stands a natural creation of God and God would say ‘’See, I am building my kingdom here; it is taking root, it begging to be seen. Maybe it doesn’t look like it should be here, but trust me, it is. Now, help me build it’’
When people ask about Kosova what will I say? When they remark on the rich and poor divide, on the children on the rubbish dump looking for plastic to sell at 15 cents a kilo. When they what to know about the effects of war on a country in our own life time. When I’m asked how the church can go to a family with nothing to offer but a prayer how will I respond. All I can say is this; I have bore whiteness to soldiers, young bold soldiers, plane clothed, normal looking, everyday soldiers. Who have a fire in their eyes and a passion in their hearts, who come from these same desperate streets and return to them at the end of every night. Who’s very lives scream Jesus, who through prayer and petition present their request to God because to them, he is the only answer. I’ve seen how God is building his kingdom here, and its through love, it’s through hope and its through the offer of something more, not food or money or a quick way out of the poverty trap. But life, life to the full, living water and blinding light that outshines every last shred of darkness.
Did you put in? I think I did, did you pull your weight?, yeah. Were you able to bless out of a place of abundance? Thanks to God, yes. What about culture did you engage and immerse without being moulded. I like to think so. What about stories, what can you tell?

Well, this morning a lady came to church holding a baby, the same baby I held just a few weeks before, the stay at home wife of a Muslim man. She was at church today and heard the story of Jesus! What more can you say

Maybe there were times when I could have tried just a little harder, maybe there was a conversation missed. Maybe more work and effort could have been put it the language. Maybe


But when I’m asked ‘’Steve, did you indeed, squeeze it like a lemon’’ I can honestly say, with the inspiration of good people, with wise words having been offered, with God at the centre of it all. ‘’Yes my friends, I think I did’’

And in all things, as a really good friend of mine reminded me ‘’Not to us, not to us oh God but to your name be the glory’’

Zoti ju bekoft

Wots all this about then?

I don’t think anything will surprise me now in Kosova. I’m was just in the bedroom, its 1.30am and there’s a wedding party going on. To my surprise and horror they were playing cotton eye Joe (you remember the one) Strange. N E Way that’s an aside

So, sparked on by a conversation about devoice, relationships and love with some Christian locals and a Muslim man. Then speaking to simmo on our way to a little farewell dinner, I started to consider love. So, in the famous words of Peter How How, ‘’wots all this about then?’’.

Simmo mentioned this list idea. You know when you write a list of all the things that you would like in a perfect partner even down to the smallest details of hair colour and shoe size, and then you pray that God will provide the perfect person for you?
I have to say I’m not so much of a fan of this idea myself. Having participated somewhat in the past and having my deepest hopes and dreams shattered, my views are now somewhat different. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not knocking the idea, if it worked for the legendary Bersiha, I’m sure it can for any of us but these days I prefer to think of it like this.......

I like to think that maybe you cross paths with someone; maybe it’s so unexpected at first that you don’t even see it coming. Maybe this person doesn’t fit any of the things that you might write on a list but there’s something in them, a glow that radiates from them, something you can’t see but it’s so obviously there, something that inspires you. Maybe you don’t have so much in common but through interaction, simply spending time together you begin to inspire one another. Maybe you would grow together as friends without any preconceived ideas to hinder the way you act towards this person. Then, maybe their personality becomes one that you simply can’t do without. Perhaps the way they live life inspires you to live. On occasion maybe you disagree with everything they say about something but in that you can see the diversities of life and how terrifyingly massive our God is. And maybe they push you towards God, through conversations and shared life their passion and desire to live like Jesus is something that churns up your innermost being in such a way that you can’t deny anything about God and wanna give him everything no matter wot the cost. Maybe it works, maybe it doesn’t, but I’ve come to believe that twisted crossed lives sold out for God have some way of connecting people, that would normally not be connected, but that can find something so special that they would never have even considered, let alone be able to put into the word to write on any list, but that just the notion of sounds perfect. It shouldn’t work. But, I like to think that in some way for someone, that’s lucky enuff to find it, and brave enuff to step into it. Maybe, it can happen.

Well, that’s what I dream. How about you?

Was that really you?

Have you ever seen that movie human traffic? You know when wacked out Danny Dyer is surprised to hear the dulcet tones of Jo Brand as the voice of reality calling him back. But as he’s been so far out of the world for so long the voice is unfamiliar and strange. Not that the voice of God is unfamiliar and distant but, my face feels just like the twisted face of Danny dyer asking ‘’..Reality, Is that you?..’’

How do you know when you really hear from God? I know you hear from God, I’ve experienced many times the leading and direction of that comes from the boss of all things. But what happens when it’s big. How can you be sure? I’ve been here for a while now and it’s coming to the wind down section. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still ready and willing to throw myself, head on, into anything that comes along but, you can help but begin to reflect on what was and consider what is to come.
This year has been amazing. What started with apprehension, reluctance and a vague idea of giving all to the one who it all came from, has turned out to be life giving, life shaping and life changing? We learned a lot, about God, developing relationship with him, our farther. We’ve seen how simple spending time with him, hearing his heart beat begins to shape how we live, as we begin to see the world as he does and allow ourselves to be broken by a broken world. It’s then that we are able to begin to live out life, and life to the full, ‘’..to pray is to change..’’ Is this one of those times?

There’s a place hear called Mahalle seefees, ‘gypsy street’. I love it, its raw rugged and uncontrollable. It’s the ruff forgotten end of town and it’s where I believe Jesus wants to be the centre. The church hears have a rented house hear in which they do amazing work with kids on a Saturday afternoon.
But!
Wot if!
What if from the tattered strands on life, from the broken lives of the inhabitance, Jesus wanted to lift up a Christ centred community and build his church?
Wot if someone caught a vision for a place of refuse and shelter, for kids to play, for teenagers to hang for adults to find an ear to listen. What if it was a hot house of prayer, a centre of the community where problems were aired and presented with prayer a petition to the founder of our faith? Maybe it could have an element of education, of learning of mission, of hospitality, of sharing the little we have with anyone who wants to except?
What if God planted the vision in humble servants to ‘’..get together with likeminded people, show up, and simply start living..?
But how do you it’s of God?
Today we were in the centre on Gjkova, singing a song I didn’t know, doing actions I didn’t understand but presenting God to the unsuspecting crowd of local folks out for a walk. Good times, as we sang I saw a tree, of medium size. Strong in stature. This is what I think I heard. ‘’..See I have planted my kingdom in this city, and see, it is growing, although the ground doesn’t look capable the roots are taking ground..’’ and then ‘’...Now help it grow..’’? What.

What now? God, again I ask, at the risk of offending you. Please teach me how to hear you voice!

Cheers

If there was ever a day to pray....................

Did I ever tell you about a friend of mine, Izmet Naziri? He burst into the seen last year having attended a prophetic prayer evening and became a Christian. Since then he’s been ‘that guy with the fire’ he’s on it bruv, telling everyone and anyone he could about Jesus. He opened his house to start a house church thing and even in the face of difficulties, threats and challenges the spirit of an evangelist was bubbling up in this guy.
Then comes a dark day – Today on our extinctive program we were gonna visit Izmet and the few families that have begun to except the truth of Jesus. The threats, the lack of employment and difficult times had obviously taken a toll on this solid soldier. Last week we went with him to the school with him to assess it for a potential kids program. He wasn’t quite himself! The frayed tethers of the simple difficulties of life were blowing in the wind, slowly unwinding. Then today, we planed to visit, encourage and uplift the small band on believers in Babaloce, the village that has chased out religion. But! We hear that Izmet has decided to quit! To give up! To turn away! Not only that, but as this guy was responsible for the entrance of Jesus he seems to have made it his job to send him out too. As we role up the village seems almost deserted. With the help of one, sound local we walk from house to house of those we’ve met on various occasions but are met, with closed doors. The warning call has been sounded, windows are closed and curtains are drawn. The road leads to the view of the perfect mountains. Under the shadow of greatness stands emptiness in a harrowing form. Izmet Nazire had become more than just a church goer to me, but a friend, we had shard many strange conversations in broken English and Albanian, we had travelled together shared food and drinks. We had prayed in his house and spoken the word of the living God over his life. Together with had pleaded the case of God over the city of Gjakova my mum and Dad had even been to his house. But today his door is well and truly closed. In the seemingly deserted streets and meet Hackie, even he, under the guise of having ‘visitors’ soon, didn’t seem to have time for the church, to pray or to simply talk.
This is a village that called the police on the Christians, and beat the Muslims into to hospital. This village seems to be trying its best to claim another life to its total. And this time it’s a friend of mine. My heart is heavy, my burden hard my eyes slowly filling and the thought of this incredible story of faith facing and undeserved, early exit. As we left we passed the house of this amazing man, his familiar sandals sit on the steps outside almost hinting that he had left something important behind.

But, I believe, this isn’t the end of the story; I believe with everything in me that there is another chapter to be told, a new tail to unfold and Greater things to come in this, harshest of environments. ‘’Are battle is not against flesh and blood but against the powers and principalities of darkness..’’ The battle is on for the lives of Izmet Naziri, Islam Naziri, Bekim, Hakie, Solomen and the people of Babaloc.

What can you do? Pray, as if it all depends on God. Coz it really does. It’s only Jesus, that will free this village!

Oh yeah, then just a quick trip to Slovan, the trailer village, that turned into 3 hours, with family after family of desperate, difficult, tragic circumstances. With nothing to offer but sweets and prayers we were armed for the vary job we were sent to do. To preach Jesus, to show kindness and to be love. What more can you do?

‘’...Lord, please! Teach us how to pray....!’’

Wot is beautiful?

So the other day I held a 3 month old baby, and as I twiddled her fingers and spoke the international language of baby to her i couldn’t help but wonder what the future held for this life. Born into situations that for some would be too much, into culture where to have just a little is to have enough, to be brought into an environment of different views on religion and how to live life. I prayed that this life, no matter where it ends up, that God would find her. I couldn’t help but look into her tiny eyes and see beauty.

This year I’ve learned how to see beauty in all manner of things, in high-rise block of flats overlooking the manor where drugs and crime run the streets, standing on the crown of Smyrna praying for rain in that city. I’ve found it in a personality, that unexpectedly took me by surprise, but with passion for life, enthusiasm and desire exploded into every situation good bad, happy and sad and I’ve learned how to see the beauty in that. In standing over Gjakova, all too aware of the desperate poverty surrounding me but calling out, joining with God and asking for a change, from peace hope and identity to be found. Some things are simply, just, beautiful.
In the eyes of a young life, just lots a family member but excited to eat well for a day. And in a beggar, who didn’t have to go hungry, who’s whole persona changed before our eyes. And iv seen it in humility, of people that love Jesus, that lavish that love on others that live as if the spreading of the word all rested on their shoulders, but who return at the end of the day to the same settings and situations of the very same people they are striving to help. And in the heart of someone’s story, a story of faith, of struggle of lose, of heart breaking situations of desperate times when the there seemed like there was no hope, and no way out, but then in holding on to the only hope that is ‘’...quite frankly, guaranteed..’’

Where do you see beauty? Do you stop to observe for long enough, do you thank God for these little (and sometimes massive, daily miracles of faith hope and peace standing out amongst a crooked and deprived generation with everything they are screaming Jesus into their environment and flooding the dark that surrounds’ them with blinding life giving light from the very author of the story.

Find something beautiful today. It’s not hard.

The word became flesh and rocked up into town

Right in the mist of it, dead in the thick of it, how many times did we talk bout this?
Right in the thick of it, hold up the mist of it. This, is, it!

So this year we talk a lot about prayer, about being the answer to your prayers, about being the hands and feet of Jesus. About turning up and being. We got excited about people that were out doing the stuff, living life on the edge and feeling alive. Echoes of Jackie Pullenges ‘’..if you wana see revival build your church in the gutter..’’ and the classic ‘’Some wanna live in the sound of church and chapel bell, but me, I wanna run a rescue shop in the very gates of hell’’.

Spurred on by the desire and passion of people to pray, we ventured out to the darken mhallah secvers? To take on an upfront full night of prayer. Armed with sleeping bags bibles and the knowledge that God can do Immeasurably more (well, simmo on the other hand was prepared for everything other than nuclear fall out with his SAS survival kit) we set up base, expecting to meet the boss, hear his plane and join with his cries for change in the forgotten end of town
In English this place is called Gypsy Street, named after a high ranking roma the population could be around 150 families. The tone of the place is set as we arrived and are greeted by an 11 year old boy sitting on the side of the road at 1130pm eating a bag of crisp. I got questions, with no answers, wot can we strange English boys do hear, can we make a difference? Will us staying up all night in any way be of any help to this community. In the natural, no! I’m sure a lot of folk stay up all night. But in the spiritual flipping heck yeah. ‘’..pray as if it all depends on God..’’ Right here, right now, it all depends on God, flicking through the pages remembering the promises. We join with the cries of Gods heart for his people called by his name to turn once again to the creator of all things. We thank God for the lives that have been changed by the relentless work of his soldiers on the ground and dare, slightly naturally sceptically, to ask for more. More than this, more than we can think or imagine or sometimes even understand. Some times without knowing the words to say I just find myself imagining wot could be!, if the tide turned, if this little street in this little known place caught the fire and was transformed. Do we dare believe for this, dare imagine the repercussions on this town this city this country. It’s hard in a place like this, when you look in the faces of the kids. You contemplate what they will become, how they will live the little prospects they have and the likely hood they are faced with in becoming a product of their environment.
And then, as dawn breaks and the daylight floods in, I see a rose. Growing strong out of the mix of concert, rubbish and dirt. Fully in bloom and beautiful and I’m touch that God can make something so sweet, so beautiful so strong out the rubbish, out of the grime, out of this place. We’ve be taught to find God in a culture. Today I saw God, in a flower and I’m amazed, again at how the same God who made the universe, in this small part of his earth care’s enuff to shine a light hear, that there might be growth, that there might be beauty, that there might be life!
If you get some time, pray for Mahalla scevers (Gypsy street) pray the daylight would flood this place that darkness would be flushed out and that the kingdom would be firmly planted hear. Pray for Pepe and Driton, and the other Christians that live in this community. Pray for the relentless work of the church hear, that they wouldn’t get tired of doing good.
This morning at church wot a humbling experience it was having prayed in this street to see 4 young girls from the community stand up and act out a little drama they had put together themselves about how good it is to read the bible, pray and worship the living God. They are coming to prayer together at 5pm tomorrow in out basement. Is this more than we can imaging? I think God has a lot more in store for this place, lets join him in seeing it come to be........

thanks